@susie@TURBORETARD9000@freon i mostly just get upset that having human intimacy at all is basically an impossible ask. everyone sends you in huge circles to go somewhere else, while the places left where you are supposed to specifically go to meet people, are basically cash grabs.
i don't really feel like an actual person, nor have i really at any point in my life. everything is transactional as fuck. and if i seek something that isn't that, there's mountains of excuses and fob-offs.